As tears run down my face I can see a dark green turtle struggling to get free from a slimy green net, huddled away in beside a big rock on the sandy seashore. What do I do? I say to myself in sadness. Do I set it free? Or is this just the end of the turtles life? Then I think to myself, I need to save this poor turtles life because it deserves to stay alive. Because it is a living creature just like us.
I feel angry and disgusted about this net wrapped around this little turtle who deserves to be free and in the water. We have tried to ban plastic but it just keeps on coming in and is taking over our lives. What are we going to do? Well, anyway I keep trying to get this little turtle free from this slimy green net and then I rip through it until the turtle is set free and it goes back in the nice water.
Then I think because of what has happened to this turtle being stuck in a net over night we should do something about it and do a big beach clean up so this doesn’t happen again and even if we just clean up the beach it will still make a big change to the world and to the sea creatures.
Well done, Tahlia, you've used some descriptive language to tell the reader about the plight of this turtle: "struggling", "slimy" and "huddled" are very effective. You've also described your feelings very clearly.
ReplyDeleteMrs Idle
Hi Tahlia, I am Isabel from Awahono School. I like your writing, it is sad but your writing is still cool. You added to your writing by using your senses and you extended your sentences. If your writing came true would you be sad? I would. If you like would you want to visit my blog? Here is the link: http://awahonoisabelj.blogspot.com/
ReplyDeleteKind regards Isabel
Hi, Isabel thank you for your thoughtful comment by saying what you liked about my writing and next time I will visit your blog.
DeleteHi Tahlia, I am Chloe from Awahono School. I like how you said tears run down my face because it makes me think of my plastic toy shop.
ReplyDeleteBy Chloe